CauliWobbles

On October 27th, 1998 – a group of brave individuals decided to do the unthinkable. To look at music that encapsulated the American Human. A set of music so diverse and entertaing that it embodies the very “Melting Pot” that is the United states. over the next 9 years, there would be 24 installments of the music that defined the NOW of our lives. Through Terrorist attacks, presidential blowjobs and the creation of the iphone, this was the America of our time. This WAS NOW[That’s what I call music]

Album: Now! That’s what I call music Vol 5 (US)

Release Date: 11/14/2000

Color: Light Blue with Teal and Yellow letters/snowflakes

Theme: Miami Dolphin Cheerleader Christmas Party

ARTIST: *NSYNC

SONG: It’s Gonna Be ME

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #1

THEN! SCORE:   10

NOW! SCORE :  10

COMMENTS: BANGER!  This song was great, is still great, and has been immoratilized by facebook memes every April 30th.  N*SYNC has definitely overtaken BSB at this point and is sitting atop the Pop throne until their lead singer (JC chazes) decides he’s too good for the rest of them.

ARTIST: 98 Degrees

SONG: All the Small Things

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #2

THEN! SCORE:   1

NOW! SCORE :  1

COMMENTS: LATINO HEEEEEEAT! But non-latino, latino heat?  Nick and Drew Lachey don’t seem spanish, but they sure are speaking at least two spanish words.  No, gracias!

ARTIST: Destiny’s Child

SONG: Jumpin’, Jumpin’

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #3

THEN! SCORE:   8

NOW! SCORE :  8

COMMENTS: This song tells you what it’s doing and then does it-  Get’s the club Jumpin’ Jumpin.  Destiny’s Child songs were actually sending a strong message of independence, or at least enough self-empowerment to FIND a baller, instead of just talking about “Chante got a man”. We Jumpin (Jumpin’)

ARTIST: Kandi

SONG: Don’t Think I’m Not

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #24

THEN! SCORE:   2

NOW! SCORE :  5.89

COMMENTS: Un-Healthy boundaries?  maybe Progressive relationships?  Either way,  you go Kandi!  Basically telling her cheatin’ man that she can get some too! Song is good too, the game is SO Real

ARTIST: Jessica Simpson

SONG: I Think I’m In Love With You

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #21

THEN! SCORE:   4

NOW! SCORE :  7

COMMENTS: I have memory holed everything about Jessica Simpson other than the “Boots” video so this was a plesant surprise.  I think this samples “Jack and Diane” (I’m not going to look it up) so Simpson probably paid more in royalties than she earned but it’s a legitimately good pop song for the fellas who would grow up to be Sydney Sweeny fans.

ARTIST: soulDecision

SONG: Faded

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #22

THEN! SCORE:   5

NOW! SCORE :  5

COMMENTS: This could be  a Maroon 5 song

ARTIST: Mystikal

SONG: Shake it fast (clean)

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #13

THEN! SCORE:   8 (8.5 if uncensored)

NOW! SCORE :  5.5 (6 If uncensored)

COMMENTS: This one is fun-  Mystikal kind of loses the plot during his verses but Pharell helps keep him on track for the most part.  I’m a bit surprised this one was actually hit but worth a play

ARTIST: Mya

SONG: Case Of The Ex (Whatcha Gonna Do)

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #2

THEN! SCORE:   3

NOW! SCORE :  5

COMMENTS: Better showing than Mya’s “Rugrats” content.  This song taught me what “mutual friends” means.  Chorus is a jam, and hearing about her turnin trick in 96′ makes you wanna fight a chick.  Stop tripping bruh

ARTIST: Aaron Carter

SONG: Aaron’s Party (Come Get It)

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #35

THEN! SCORE:   1

NOW! SCORE :  -100

COMMENTS: This song is bad-  very very bad.  12 year old white boy who got this song through nepatism rapping about throwing a killer party, but make sure you keep it PG (Spilling Juice on the couch!).  Shout out Aunt Joan, but we, as a human Race, whould take songs like this and destroy them forever so that when the aliens find our ancient ruins thousands of years from now they don’t actually think we listened to this shit

ARTIST: Britney Spears

SONG: Lucky

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #23

THEN! SCORE:   5

NOW! SCORE :  3

COMMENTS: Another NOW!, Another Britney Song.  Brit Can’t decide if her loniliness is killing her or she’s not that innocent.  This song is an incredibly on the nose look at fame/stardom that maybe could’ve been a a sneak peek into the artist’s mind for the next 20 years

ARTIST: Baackstreet Boys

SONG: Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #6

THEN! SCORE:   6

NOW! SCORE :  6

COMMENTS: Brooding, spanish guitar,  Be still mi corizon! BSB wasn’t holding off the singing Fatones for the top spot anymore, but this is a reminder that they still had something in the tank.

ARTIST: Sisqo

SONG: Incomplete

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #1

THEN! SCORE:   2

NOW! SCORE :  2

COMMENTS: The fact that “The Thong Song” was not on any of these NOW cds is criminal (or it came out too early and I’m not going to look it up) and erasure of one of the most culturally significant songs in HISTORY (That’s a fact, not a joke).  This song is a sub-par RB Ballad, although talking about girls on mmagazine covers under his covers is a baller move by Mr. Sisqo

ARTIST: Mandy Moore

SONG: I Wanna Be With You

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #24

THEN! SCORE:   0

NOW! SCORE :  0

COMMENTS: This is the definitiion of a forgettable pop song.  Generic Title, Generic lyrics, Nothing good or remarkable about it, I wouldn’t have remembered it existed

ARTIST: Janet Jackson

SONG: Doesn’t Really Matter

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #1

THEN! SCORE:   4

NOW! SCORE :  6.8

COMMENTS: As noted, R&B was a blind spot for me given my demographics/Geographics of the time- I do remember this song, but don’t remember it being this good.  Another #1 for Janet, who was kind of a monster at the time- no wonder she was asked to take her shirt off at the superbowl.  I would put this on a playlist- although the drumline “Edit” in the middle seems unessecary

ARTIST: BBMak

SONG: Back Here

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #13

THEN! SCORE:   3

NOW! SCORE :  1

COMMENTS: This song sounds like it’s played at the beginning of an 11am Saturday morning show about teens.  I think BBMack did better overseas, perhaps they should’ve done more to pursue a Big Mac collaboration stateside and get more traction thnan this song did

ARTIST: Nine Days

SONG: Absolutely (Story Of A Girl)

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #6

THEN! SCORE:   6

NOW! SCORE :  6

COMMENTS: I remember this song and fully expected to drop the “NOW!” score of this song, but there are plenty of worse songs that you could listen to from these albums.  Another one you hear in an adult rock rotation every other week but you’re happy enough that it came on

ARTIST: 3 Doors Down

SONG: Kryptonite

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #3

THEN! SCORE:   8

NOW! SCORE :  7

COMMENTS: I REALLY Liked this one when it came out, rushed out to buy this CD.  3 Doors down were thrown into the Goo Goo Dolls, Matchbox 20 grouping of this era and this was their first hit.  This song has good song structure for a radio play and is just a good listen overall.  Great song title

ARTIST: Everclear

SONG: Wonderful

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #11

THEN! SCORE:   8

NOW! SCORE :  7

COMMENTS: I want to be mad about more everclear here HOWEVA I love this song.  It’s sad but happy at the same time and doesn’t come across as patronizing, even though it’s kind of aimed towards kids.  Almost made me wish my parents weren’t so stable growing up so I could relate better (Whooopps, that would’ve been dumb).  2nd best Everclear song behind ‘Santa Monica’

ARTIST: Bon Jovi

SONG: It’s My Life

PEAK BILLBOARD POSITION:  #33

THEN! SCORE:   7

NOW! SCORE :  7

COMMENTS: This was a last gasp from Bon Jovi but guess what, it works!  It’s not the best song in the world but it is a very good Bon Jovi song.  Soaring chorus that is easy to sing along to or play during a college football promo in 2002