Lost Transcript: PMT Transcript – H-man 4/20/23
Transcript begins in middle of Ad-read prior to interview start
PFT: …..So with a spacious interior, chrome detail and a newly designed tailpipe, many people are calling this “the truck you want to fuck”…. And now, here’s our interview
(Whrrssshhh)
Big Cat: Alright, today we welcome on a very, very special guest, he is the supreme leader of the 3rd Reich, the chancellor of Germany – Adolf Hitler.
Hitler: Thank you for having me on, love the show
Big Cat: Ok, so PFT has been trying to get you on for quite a while, but before we get into all of that, you’ve got a new book coming out entitled “Reich or Wrong: Decisions about Life, Love and Faith”. I did read the forward from Mussolini and I WILL give this one a read in the summer, in between football season.
Hitler: Thank you, it’s a reflection on where I’ve been and what’s next for Hitler
PFT Commenter: The Ditch is the limit for you. Do you think Frank Reich is trying to encroach on your position?
Hitler: Well, that would make him a 4th Reich and he ran out of Luck years ago when he lost Andrew. (Laughs at his own joke)
Big Cat: So, Like I said, we’re more of Football’s Football Guys than we are book guys – I know you went to Art College in Vienna – Do you think there’s a chance that they can actually get it done this year and make it to the playoffs?
Hitler: Well, we’ve got Lucerne and Stutgart at home, which helps, but it will be tough to go into Stalingrad late in the year so that will be the test. That said, Kuchler’s been crushing the youth recruiting recently so we shall see.
PFT Commenter: Very true. What would you say is a bigger atrocity – Normandy, or Carson Wentz’ Contract?
(All Laugh)
Hitler (Very Serious): Well…..all Red hairs are an abomination to God and should be eliminated, so paying them money to live is not acceptable.
Big Cat (taken Aback): Oh…alright……well ‘Dolf, can I call you ‘Dolf?
Hitler: Sure, Goebbles does all the time
Big Cat: Billy has a question for you…..go ahead Billy
Billy Football: So, in the Olympics- did you ever consider giving the Germans a Lipozoid complex tri-stack to help them beat Jesse Owens? It doesn’t show up on 1930’s testing.
Big Cat: Billy, are you trying to give Germany a way to beat the USA??
Billy Football (In hushed voice, directly into the mic): No – the Lipozoid complex tri-stack will give them MASS, not the lean muscle which they need to win in sprinting – Jesse Owens should take a vico-loid Bi-stack
Hitler: You know I can hear you right, Wilhelm?
PFT Commenter: Alright Jake also has a question….
Jake: Mr. Chancellor – Jake Marsh, Pardon My Take Podcast. How do you feel you stack up against other dictators historically, like Polpot or Coach K?
Hitler: It’s a fair question Jake, but I usually leave those discussions up to the media. I mean think about me comparing myself to someone like Jim Boehiem….He’s got a ring, which he owes to Gerry Mcnamara’s athletic superiority, but he’s also only got one murder and I have 6 million- so it depends on how you look at it.
PFT Commenter: It’s like the Marino vs. Elway Debate
Big Cat: Which brings me to my last question: MJ or Lebron?
Hitler: I would kill MJ first, he is far more superior and a far bigger threat
Big Cat: Yessssssss, I knew it
PFT Commenter: OK, My Last, Last question is brought to you by Rhineback – Rhineback has partnered with Hugo Boss to create a sleek product embroidered with your favorite logos or patches. They also have introduced a long sleeve option in case you make a great decision to invade Russia in the winter.
My question is: If there is only one Hitler, and he ends up getting shot in the head and burned to death in a bunker along with his wife, how many Hitlers do you have left?
Hitler: I don’t know…….
PFT Commenter: You have One Fewer (Fuher)
(All Laugh, Hitler let’s out Bert Kreischer style laugh)
Big Cat: Ok, Dolf…this has been great, you’re now a recurring guest. Thanks Man, Thanks Man, see ya.

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